Triumph over tobacco.

Only a mean-spirited commentator would begrudge the Government and anti-smoking lobby their right to their happy-dance, victory celebration over the news that the high court has refused the appeal against plain packaging.

 This legislation has been described as a move that’s both “groundbreaking” - and - “not chicken-shit.”

There can be little doubt that it’s a devastating blow - especially if you believe some fairly convincing government research proving that it’s the seductive colors and cunning graphic designs on the cigarette packets that causes the actual addiction.

Minister for Health and Aging, Nicola Roxon remains confident that on December first, the day they’re calling PPD (plain packaging day), smokers across the country will experience the dawn of a new age.

On that day smokers walking into their local tobacconist will be met with the sight of shelf upon shelf of drab olive-green packaging. This should cause (in the worst-case scenario) a failure to remember why they walked into the shop. In the best-case scenario they should completely forget that they were ever a smoker in the first place.

If this psychological neutron bomb were not sufficient, the initiative is supported by a secondary Machiavellian coup: 


“The only thing to distinguish one brand from another will be the brand and product name in a standard colour, standard position and standard font size and style.”

The implication is clear. Now, in order to purchase tobacco products, smokers will need to be able to either, (a) remember the name of their favorite brand, or, (b) read.

Legislators, in no mood to show mercy, piled Pelion upon Ossa with a third wave of attacks:

“In addition, health warnings will be updated and increased from 30 per cent to 75 per cent of the front of the pack, as well as 90 per cent of the back.”

Since these old soldiers joined the war (health warnings in 1973 and gruesome pics of surgery and brown fingers in 2006) their net effect may have been zero but as of PPD, it will be at least twice that much.

Anti-smoking lobbyists are happy to accept some of the downside side-effects of the legislation. That plain packaging may create a level playing field for all nicotine marketers competing for the lungs of our children is seen as an acceptable loss. But the fact that the legislation will save the tobacco industry millions in packaging costs is causing some concern.

Anti-smokers laugh off the notion that it will be invested in a newly bullish cigarette-case industry saying it’s more likely that big-time tobacco will put the money towards a fighting fund to combat the next wave of crippling legislation.

Inside sources say that the next campaign will be the shock and awe phase of the war – legislation to force the removal of the little gold band round the top of the filter-tip.

On that day the final victory will be in sight and we’ll all be able to breathe easy.

© Ray Lillis 2012